LUBE ME BABY | WHY LUBE IS NEEDED FOR GREATER PLEASURE

LUBE ME BABY | WHY LUBE IS NEEDED FOR GREATER PLEASURE

Why Not Using Lube Should Be A Crime (& Why It’s A MUST)

LUBE ME BABY…ahhhh yeah (sung in the “freak me baby” tempo)

WHY oh WHY have some of us been sleeping on LUBE for so long?

The world of porn has taught us that our natural lubrication is enough and don’t get me wrong, the body is a wonderful juice producing machine but what happens when your body just isn’t feeling that juicy sometimes? Or even at all?

The following is my deep dive into what lube is, why you need it and proof that you’re not broken if you don’t produce lubrication naturally.

WHAT IS LUBRICATION?

Personal lubricant, or “lube,” is a liquid or gel that’s intended to prevent unwanted friction during sex.

You can use it for many types of sex, including penetrative and anal sex, as well as external self pleasure. 

THE HISTORY OF LUBE

In Egypt (2000+ BCE) some people used honey, animal fats, and sometimes plant oils as lubrication. Some mixtures even doubled as contraceptives (like honey mixed with natron or acacia).

If you want to see me go down a deep rabbit hole about the acacia tree and this natural contraceptive click here 

In Greece & Rome (500 BCE – 400 CE) Olive oil was common, not only for cooking but also for sex. Old texts mention oil being used to reduce friction and enhance pleasure.

People in China & Japan (1000 BCE+) were known to use herbal blends, aloe and plant-based oils as lubrication. Historians and ethnobotanists infer that agar or similar seaweed gels may have been experimented with in the same way but because pleasure is so shame filled there’s no direct documentation of this but it makes sense.

And in various African and Indigenous cultures, people relied on shea butter, palm oils, animal fats, or saliva which I found very interesting.

Although I’m not too keen on all the usage of animal fats, I will say I was highly impressed and inspired by all of the holistic forms of lubrication that were created. 

Fast forward to the 1800’s, post colonization & bring in modern medicine & more standardized formulas.

In the 1800s Glycerin and petroleum jelly (Vaseline, invented in 1872) were sometimes used as sexual lubricants, though they were not designed for it.

The dangers of this is the lasting impact this could have on the person who was using it, especially for people with vulvas, a very open orifice susceptible to many ailments caused by bacteria. 

What chemicals and fragrances must have been used back in the day? Based on the toxic and harmful fragrances that are still used in some of your very favorite products today, I shouldn’t be surprised by the lack of safety protocols taken when creating these products. If they weren’t originally intended for internal use then again I ask, what could the lasting effects be?

In 1904 KY Jelly was actually created in the U.S. by pharmacists for medical purposes like gynecological exams or surgical lubrication and it later became one of the first mainstream sexual lubricants. 

This does make me wonder, though, are the medical lubrications the same exact formula as the Personal lubrications?

We basically went from natural and plant based forms of lubrication, to chemicals and non body safe additives. 

In the 1960s–1980s expansion of water-based lubes marketed specifically for sex.

In the 1990s–2000s Silicone-based lubricants were introduced for longer-lasting play and because they were considered more body-safe. Silicone lubes don’t get absorbed by the skin or mucous membranes. Most silicone lubes are also free from common irritants like glycerin or parabens (though of course you should always check the label).

And Now the shelves overflow with:

• Silicone lubes that last all night,

• Organic, vegan and natural blends 

• Flavored delights (although again, are these natural?)

• Warming, cooling, and tingling formulas to spice things up

• CBD-infused elixirs merging plant medicine with pleasure.

THE MYTHS ABOUT USING LUBE

1. Using lubrication during your intimate moments with a partner means that your partner doesn’t turn you on (FALSE)

2.  Using lubrication for solo play means you’re broken (DOUBLE FALSE) 

3. If you’re not wet all the time, something's wrong with you (again VERY wrong)

Are you ready to end our internalized shame and stigma surrounding lube?!

WHY IS LUBRICATION SO IMPORTANT?

“According to a 2009 Indiana University study of 2,453 women, participants reported that, more than 70 percent of the time, lube made sex more pleasurable and enjoyable.” - Healthline.com

Natural Lubrication is basically your body’s way of saying, “Yes, I’m turned on, I’m ready, let’s do this.”  It’s not just about making things “slippery” (though that’s fabulous too)  it’s about protection, comfort, and amplifying the sensations you feel.

Here’s the science-y side: natural lubrication comes from glands near the vaginal opening and the vaginal walls themselves, which swell with increased blood flow during arousal. 

That fluid reduces friction, which means less irritation, fewer micro-tears, and a lot more glide.

Without it, sex or self-pleasure can feel uncomfortable and even painful. With it? Smooth sailing into deeper pleasure. This is why lubrication is imperative during any kind of sexual pleasure.

Lubrication can also heighten your sensitivity. When there’s enough moisture, nerve endings can fire more freely, allowing you to feel every stroke, pulse, and tingle. 

Translation: wetter often equals better. 

Remember: If you don’t always self-lubricate in a way you’d prefer, it doesn’t mean you’re not aroused. 

Natural lubrication levels can shift with stress, hormones, age, and even medications. 

That’s why bottled lube is such a gift. It’s not “cheating”, it’s genuinely enhancing. Think of it like adding vegan butter to popcorn: technically edible without it, but it's soooooo much better with. 

LUBE & IT’S DIFFERENT KINDS

Now that we’ve talked about your body’s natural lubrication, let’s get into the kind you add in from a bottle. 

Here’s the thing… not all lubes are created equal. 

If you care about what goes in your body as much as what goes on your body, choosing a vegan and cruelty-free lube is a must.

Why? Because some mainstream lubricants sneak in animal by-products (yes, really, I know, disgusting), unnecessary chemicals, or are tested on animals. 

It’s important for me to note that pleasure should never come at the expense of your health or another being’s wellbeing. 

Vegan, cruelty-free lubes are known to be made with cleaner ingredients that support your body’s natural balance, while also protecting animals and the environment. Who doesn’t love conscious pleasure?

What Lube To Use (and Why It Matters)

Fun Fact: different lubes can be used for different things

Oil-Based Lubes Are Good (Sometimes)

The Cons:

• Oil-Based Lubes (like coconut oil, baby oil, or petroleum jelly) might seem smooth at first, but they can actually trap bacteria, throw off your pH, and increase the risk of infections. 

• IMPORTANT: DO NOT use oil based lube with a condom. Oils break down latex condoms meaning you’re basically inviting them to snap. This is why water based lubes are best for condom use.

• Oil-based lubricants can break down silicone, making your toy sticky, porous, or unusable over time. Note: you’ll need soap that cuts oil and hot water to properly sanitize.

Although condom breakage + yeast infections are something oil based lubes have a reputation of causing, they do have their place.

Pros:

• Long-Lasting Glide: Oils don’t dry up as quickly as water-based lubes, so they’re great for marathon sessions where you don’t want to keep reapplying. It also can make the hand to skin contact feel amazing. Think of it like the slow-cooker of lube: steady, smooth, and in it for the long haul.

• Anal Play: Because they stick around longer and provide extra cushion, many people like oil-based lubes for anal sex (just make sure you’re not using latex condoms, because oil breaks them down).

• External Pleasure & Massages: Oils are dreamy for clitoral play, vulva massages, or full-body erotic touch. They double as a sensual massage oil, so you can slide seamlessly from shoulders to thighs to all the delicious places in between.

• Non-Latex Condoms/Toys: If you’re using polyurethane or nitrile condoms, or toys made of glass, stainless steel, or hard plastic, oil-based lubes can be just fine.

So you can use 'em! Just with caution. 

Silicone-based lubes + Why To Use With Caution

This one is a combined mix of pros and cons.

Silicone-based lubes can be amazing for water play (shower sex, pool fun), but there is a catch: they don’t mix well with silicone toys. 

• Silicone-on-Silicone: can degrade your favorite vibrator or dildo, making it tacky or breaking down its surface. Nobody wants their $150 toy turning into a science experiment right?

• Water Play: Silicone lube is queen in the shower, bath, or pool. Unlike water-based lubes, it won’t wash away the second water hits, so you can keep things slippery under the shower.

• Long-Lasting Sessions: Silicone doesn’t absorb into your skin or dry out quickly. Translation? You can go for hours without reapplying. Perfect for extended play when you don’t want interruptions.

• Anal Play: Because it stays slick and cushiony, silicone is amazing for anal sex or toy play (just not silicone toys, more on that in a sec). It reduces friction and helps protect delicate tissue.

• Sensitive Skin: Many silicone lubes are hypoallergenic and free from irritating additives, making them a safe bet for people who get easily irritated by water-based formulas.

• Non-Silicone Toys: Glass, metal, or hard plastic toys pair beautifully with silicone lube. It gives them that ultra-glidey, velvet-smooth feel.

Water-Based Lube + Why I Love Them

Water based lube is the most versatile!

The rule of thumb: It’s safe for most toys, gentle on your body, and easy to clean up. If you do use silicone lube, keep it away from your silicone toys. And save the oils for massages, not your vulva.

Cons:

• Dries Out Faster: You may need to reapply during longer sessions. Think of it like a sip of water instead of a full glass… refreshing, but fleeting.

• Not Great for Water Play: In the shower, bath, or pool, it washes away quickly, leaving you sliding into “oops, I need more” territory.

• Less Slick for Anal: While safe, some water-based lubes aren’t as cushiony for anal play compared to silicone or oil lubes.

Pros:

• Toy-Friendly: Safe with all toys, including silicone, glass, metal, and plastic. No weird reactions or sticky messes.

• Condom-Compatible: Works perfectly with latex, polyurethane, or nitrile condoms. No breaking, no worries.

• Easy to Clean: Washes off with water, so your sheets, skin, and toys stay happy and stain-free.

• Gentle on Skin: Most are hypoallergenic and free from irritating oils or additives. Perfect for sensitive vulvas.

• Versatile: Can be used for vaginal, anal, and clitoral play, it’s a true all-arounder.

My favorite vegan lubrications

Now that we know all about the world of Lube, you may be looking for a safe and specific suggestion when it comes to the lubrication you choose. Here are some personal favorites of mine that you can find in The Ethereal Pleasure Oasis’s pleasure shop:

Water Based: Dame

Water Based: Coconu

HONORABLE MENTION: AROUSAL SERUM BY DAME I haven’t tried this one yet but i’ve heard nothing but great things about it. I consider this more of a serum than a lube hence why it’s an honorable mention.

So babes, If all of this is making you curious (or even a little tingly), I invite you to dive deeper with me inside my Pleasure Library. It’s a cozy online sanctuary that I created just for women like you. It’s a sacred, playful space filled with videos, guided audios, and practical tools to help you explore breathwork, expand your pleasure, and reconnect with your body on a whole new level.

Think of it as your personal treasure chest for pleasure, where science meets sensuality

Ready to explore? Come join the Pleasure Library and let’s breathe, play, and rise together.

I love you to the moon 

Love & Lube

Love Atiya

Founder Of The Ethereal Pleasure Oasis

blog: WHY LUBE IS NEEDED FOR GREATER PLEASURE